Happy 1st Birthday Sebastian!

I can’t believe I am the parent to a one year old baby. Can I even still call him a baby?! Is he a toddler now?

One was a tricky milestone for me. It’s a time of big change in a baby and a parent’s life. Every day Sebastian looks more and more like a little boy rather than a baby. He can do more, he is more active, he babbles and chats away, we’re seeing more and more of his personality. And all of that is amazing but also a terrifying reminder of how quickly time moves on!

For me it also means thinking about settling Sebastian into nursery and returning to work. I’m not looking forward to it one bit, although I am confident nursery is the right place for him and I even believe I will get used to being back at work after the initial adjustment. It’s just the letting go. Sebastian has been by my side for a whole year. I know him better than anyone and I feel like I don’t know how to be without him. I need to try and make the transition to being apart from him easier on myself and that’s the job for July. Nursery will offer him so many experiences for learning and development, I just hope he takes to it well and understands that I don’t want to leave him!

The week run up to his birthday was tough. I felt really emotional and burst into tears at any little thing. I think I’d buried my head in the sand about his birthday and so hadn’t organised as well as I could have. That meant a lot of last minute faffing that I probably didn’t need.

I also thought back to the time we were having a year ago. If you’ve read my birth story you’ll know that I was hospitalised a week before Sebastian was born, with preeclampsia and obstetric cholestasis. It was such a stressful time, with no idea of what was to come.

But we made it, we survived the first year as parents. We’re still in one piece, with just a few scars to tell the tale!

Sebastian is amazing. He is a happy, smiley, cheeky, sensitive, playful, strong little boy and I can’t wait to see what the next years bring.

Here’s to you my beautiful baby boy!

JH