Given the number of posts I’ve seen knocking around about Halloween make up, Halloween cupcakes, Halloween films and Halloween dog outfits, I’m sure this post will not be popular with a lot of people! However, I thought I’d stand up and say it out loud. I hate Halloween. Like, I really, really, really don’t like it. I’ll have to check with my Mum, but I honestly don’t think I’ve ever liked it. WHYYYYYY?! I hear you cry. Well let me tell you.
Scary films? Nope.
I’ve never liked scary films – seeing other people scared makes me scared – I will happily admit I’m a big fat wuss! I watched Scream when I was a teenager hidden behind a cushion. I can’t watch Final Destination because I genuinely think that Death is out to get me everywhere I turn. When I was growing up, we kept our rabbits in cages outside and every night I’d have to go out to put them to bed and feed them. If it was dark, I would run outside with my torch, shine it in the corner of the gardens to check there were no beasties and run back in the house, convinced that a wolf was chasing me. Call it an overactive imagination, but I’d rather feel happy and safe than scared out of my wits.
Trick or treating? Not for me!
OK so this might be a little bit controversial but I’ve never liked the thought of going door to door asking people for sweets. I don’t understand where the tradition came from and isn’t it just a bit too much like begging? I don’t have kids myself but even when I was a kid I don’t recall ever going trick or treating. In fact I specifically remember my brother getting those little snap things from the joke shop that made a loud bang and throwing them at people as they walked out of the garden!
When I was a student a Mum brought her tiny young daughter around to our house the DAY BEFORE Halloween (presumably that was the trick rather than the treat?!) and I didn’t have any sweets in the house. If she’d wanted a shot of vodka or some super noodles then yeah, great, but sweets or chocolate? Not a chance. I scrabbled around in my room for an awkwardly long amount of time before grabbing a handful of pennies and shoving them in her box. I shudder at the thought of it.
Halloween costumes? Give me a break.
Sexy cat anyone? Sexy cave woman? Sexy Gandalf?! Search Google images for women’s Halloween costume and the first page is likely to bring up a lot of these suggestions. But hey, guess what, not all female costumes have to have the word sexy in the title to appeal to us. Remember Cady dressing as the corpse bride in Mean Girls? Yeah, well that’s how you feel if you turn up at a Halloween party in anything other than skin tight leggings or a mini skirt and fishnets. I do believe it is getting better and the pressure on women to dress up for others is lessening, but for me the Mean Girls joke still rings all too true.
So that’s me, I’m a Halloween Scrooge. Come 31st October you will find me hidden in my bedroom with a bottle of wine watching Netflix with the lights off. And that’s not because I’m watching a horror film, it’s because I’m avoiding anyone knocking on my door. Unfortunately this year I’ll be in America for Halloween so I’m going to experience it at a whole other level. Let’s just hope there are no trick or treaters in hotels, right?
What do you think? Does anyone else out there hate Halloween as much as me?